AIs that the question? I would hope that a person would want to have complete information before they form an opinion on something but sadly that is not the truth. All too often, I have seen many opportunities for people to grow and benefit from watching, listening, and letting something unfold but that get missed because they are so very busy being right and organizing you. Instead, just like answering questions and comments before they are completely heard, they are quick to respond. I have come up against this recently in my life and although it is not the first time, I’m sure it won’t be the last time. However the irritation will always be the same. How dare you judge me when you don’t have the perfect ruler to measure me against? Who are you to decide that the way I live my life or take care of my health is wrong when you are doing things far worse than I? Since when is it okay for you to let your ego run rampant and make assessments on me? Shouldn’t you be looking in the mirror at yourself first? It’s so easy to give unsolicited advice and there are those who do it all the time. I quite frankly am tired of it. Even worse is the recent incident was based on incomplete information. The person had already made up their mind about me and didn’t even give me a chance to say anything that might change their mind. I am not interested in changing their mind now because if it is that easy, then that is someone I don’t really want to be calling friend. I don’t have to justify or defend myself to anyone. It is quite alright to disagree about things but don’t go thinking you’re right because we have different points of view. I guess why this is so important to me is because this was from someone who claims loudly and proudly that they will never, ever judge. Well, here I am with egg on my face and smarting from the experience but I won’t let it colour how I am with other people. I deeply believe that there is good in everyone. I hope my experience is something that will help someone else along in their life. Please just give a person a chance before you decide that something is so!
Peace
It sounds as though you have been hurt, my sistah. While I don't know (nor do I HAVE to) the details, I do know that having someone do something unfair and unwarranted takes a while to get over. You have experience and kindness on your side; that is better than the 'right' the other person has to judge you. Thank you for sharing your heart; I care so much that you are there...
ReplyDeleteThank you "A". It is comforting to know that others have gone through this as well and I know you have had some extreme trials to face too. Hugs!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you shared this, Heather. 'Irritation' describes how these situations make me feel too. A current one I face involves family. I can't change them but I can nurture me. So I'm truly glad to have read this and found an answer or two; very good timing for me!
ReplyDeleteI wish you great joy!
Dixie
Hi Dixie; It is especially difficult when it is a family member because we feel differently about how to deal with it. I wish you the best in taking charge of it and I agree with you about nurturing yourself. Best to you.
ReplyDeleteHeather
Hi Heather,
ReplyDeleteSadly, there are too many folks who would rather pass judgement, make assumptions that are convenient for their mind set.
The situation you describe reeks of hypocrisy from that person who had predetermined what there perceptions of you would be.
Yet, despite this aggravating and unsavoury situation, you still embrace the ethos that it is unfair and yes unhealthy, to pass judgement on our fellow man. All the facts, without misinformation, need to be in place.
Quite right!
Take care and talk soon.
Gary.
Hi Gary; Thanks for the input. I think it has something to do with how society views itself as a hurried important spectator and that it has to react instead of pro act. I believe all people can and should be much better than that. I'm not perfect but I do try to be respectful and empathetic to others. Hugs to you!!
ReplyDeleteHeather - I, too, have fallen victim to severely judgmental people who were operating under less-than-full information. Many of those people prefer to run off and make judgments without full knowledge because the full knowledge would take away the fun of attacking the other person. It's a shame and it is oh so very hurtful.
ReplyDeleteBe strong - the truth always wins out in the end.
Thank you Richard. Yes, those people usually are the ones I would refer to as "well poisoners". They have no regard for others and sadly even for themselves. I appreciate your input. Have a great day!
ReplyDelete